Ep: 2×09 Fold Equity
Reviewed by: useyourwords & 3rdrocker
Ship rating: 3/10 (Gillian obviously cares for Cal but he is as dense as ever)
Fold Equity finds Lightman, Foster, and Reynolds in Las Vegas to find a missing high profile, young poker player who is meant to be playing at the final table in a poker tournament. Lightman, who had formerly been banned from the city, has been asked back to help the investigation. According to Foster, he is a great poker player but he prefers roulette because it is more exciting and has the worst odds in the casino.
Lightman and Foster start interviewing the remaining 4 poker players in the tournament and Lightman takes a special interest in (Ta-tas on the table) Poppy. Foster notices and points out to him that she’s trouble. Lightman, like a moth to a flame, spends the night with Poppy *gag* anyway. The next morning, they are called to a crime scene where they find a poker coach dead in the trunk of a car.
They find out it is the blueberry pancake eating Russian player who is responsible for the death of the poker coach and is therefore also to blame for the young poker prodigy’s disappearance. Once that’s figured out, they find the missing poker player. Lightman decides to put the one million dollars they earned on double zero and the episode ends with the sound of the ball dropping into a number. Did he win or did he lose? We’ll never know.
Loker & Torres in the lab playing toss
Ria: I am so leaving work early, maybe get a pedicure on the way home.
Eli: It’s good we’re not in Vegas.
Ria: Oh, I can catch up on my reading.
Eli: I have a date tonight.
Eli: A third date. (throws ball at Doug’s station)
Doug: Come on. (he leaves)
Eli: Sorry, Doug.
Ria: With a girl? A human girl?
Eli: Oh, ha-ha, you’re so…not funny. (checks email) Foster sent us a video file to score.
Ria: Oh, one file shouldn’t take too long.
(Messages keep popping up)
Eli: Oh, no.
Ria: I hope your date’s patient.
(Eli tosses football to Ria)
Gillian walking past poker players at table
Russian Guy: Hello, beautiful lady.
Poker player: That’s not gonna happen, boss. She’s too good for you.
Poker face Poppy: The way she walks, she’s too good for anyone.
Cal: That’s not nice, Poppy.
Poker face Poppy: Nice isn’t fun.
Loker & Torres analyzing Poppy’s microexpressions
Eli: Oh, look at that! That’s what we call a macroexpression. She may as well stick her tongue down his throat.
Ria: No, she wants something from him.
Eli: Well, maybe she’s just attracted to him.
Ria: You are such an innocent, Loker. Tell me, this girl that you’re dating, where do you take her?
Eli: Uh, tonight Luigi’s. Last week Meridiana, the week before that La—
Ria: No-no-no, you’re doing this all wrong. How do you not know this?
Eli: Okay. I know a lot. About dating.
Ria: You think you are getting lucky tonight, don’t you? Well, you are not. Hundred bucks says she’s dating you for the 5 star food.
Eli: Okay, if we’re gonna bet, I want your office for one week.
Ria: Well, in that case, I want your ant farm.
Eli: It’s a bet.
(They shake on it)
The female roulette
Cal: I’m letting Amadeo go.
Gillian: No, no, don’t do that. The ransom call is loaded with syntactical anomalies. I’d expect more use of idiom for one thing, and, and it seems almost edited, and I think the person we’re looking for’s first language isn’t English.
Cal: Well, I’m getting nothing from him.
Gillian: Well, what are you getting from her, other than lust?
Cal: Excuse me?
Cal: Well, she’s still a suspect.
Gillian: She’s the female equivalent of roulette, and you like the view.
Cal: It’s a very nice view. You’re smothering again.
Cal & Gillian sitting alone at poker table
Gillian: Not to be smothering, but are you okay?
Cal: Yeah. Why wouldn’t I be?
Gillian: Well, you’ve known Mason a long time.
Cal: No, I, I knew him a long time ago. That’s just completely different then. I mean, he took a gamble and he lost. His choice.
Cal: Speaking of gambles. She’s roulette. Stay away.
(Cal checks out Gillian as she walks away)
Cal & Poppy (right afterward)
Poker face Poppy: Is your friend Foster as suspicious as you?
Cal: More so.
Poker face Poppy: She doesn’t like me.
Cal: Not at all. She fears women like you bringing out the worst in me.
Poker face Poppy: Promise?
Cal, Gillian, Ben & Poppy at crime scene
Gillian: You got the note early this morning?
Gillian: In your room?
Gillian: And then you got some prostitutes to cause a distraction so you could sneak out of the hotel?
Cal: Kind of ingenious, don’t you think.
Ben: Foster, why can’t you take it easy? We’re in Vegas.
Gillian: I just think it’s a bad idea to antagonize Ellis. Among other bad ideas.
Poker face Poppy: I was happy to help.
Cal: She was.
Loker & Torres analyzing his date’s microexpressions
Eli: Okay, now, look at the contraction of the orbicularis oculi pars lateralis. With this smile there, that’s classic action unit 6. She’s so into me.
Ria: But looking for someone better to talk to, that’s bad.
Eli: Alright, here, I’ll show you something that’ll blow your mind. Oops, the lip lick, the universal signal for I want you.
Eli: Case closed. I win.
Ria: Loker, I’m gonna let you in on one of the true rules of womanhood.
Ria: If a guy’s boring you, like you wanna stick a fork in your eye boring.
Ria: A good lip lick can rattle him enough to change the conversation topic.
Eli: M-, uh. Well, I was going on about the herd mentality in the Kenyan elk population. I’m not getting your office for a week, am I?
Eli: Ingrid’s not dating me, she’s dating my restaurant choices.
Eli: Mm-hm. Okay.
(Eli gives ant farm to Ria)
Eli: Treat them well.
Cal & Gillian at poker table with suspects, Russian guy hits on Gillian
Cal: (to Poppy) Anything else you keeping from me?
Russian Guy: Well, your partner makes me light in the head. (chuckles)
(Poppy gives a look)
Russian Guy: Well, I have to begin my pre-game ritual, so, why don’t you come and have, uh, blueberry pancakes with me?
Ben: You’re not going anywhere. Sit down.
Cal: That’s a bit naughty. Isn’t it? Hitting on Foster here while your girlfriend’s sitting right there. You two are, uh, you’re, you know, sleeping together, are you?
Poker face Poppy: Occasionally, but it doesn’t mean anything.
Russian Guy: She sleeps with everyone.
Cal & Gillian walking poolside after Russian guy is captured
Gillian: So how did you know she’d go to him?
Cal: Well, it was in her own best interest. Some people don’t change.
Gillian: So you knew she had information the whole time, but you still slept with her?
Cal: No, that’s not why I slept with her.
Loker & Torres in lab
Ria: Medium triple latte.
Ria: How long you been watching that?
Eli: Mm, not long.
Ria: (sighs) I lied. She likes you.
Eli: Nice try, but I saw the lip lick. The, uh, true rule of womanhood.
Ria: Yeah, uh, Loker, there’s no such thing as true rule of womanhood. I made it up. You were doing that really super annoying smug guy thing. I was pissed. And I wanted the ant farm.
Eli: I’m smug? Well, how do I know that you’re telling the truth now?
(Ria plays back video)
Ria: Not only is she laughing, she’s looking right into your eyes.
Eli: She’s being polite.
(Ria gets into Loker’s face)
Ria: This isn’t being polite. Her pupils were dilated.
Eli: Well, she did touch my knee at one point. (He puts his hand on Ria’s knee; Ria stands up) So you think I should call her?
Ria: (breathlessly) Definitely.
Gillian & Ben at end
Gillian: Hey, Ben.
Ben: Hey! (he checks her out) Hey, wow, you look…wow.
Gillian: You look great.
Ben: Yeah, you, too. I mean, the dress, the shoes, the whole thing. It’s lovely.
Gillian: (chuckles) I thought I should embrace the Vegas.
(more player introductions)
Gillian: Hey, scoot.
Ben: No, no. Nope, no-no-no-no-no. I’m not letting you spend your last night here, looking like that, watching other people play poker. Forget about it.
Gillian: But I’m not interested in gambling.
Ben: Do you really think that that’s all this town has to offer? Well, just wait and see. I’m gonna blow your mind.
(Ben offers his arm and Gillian takes it as they begin to leave)
Ben: I’m gonna go get the car, and I’ll meet you out front. First class service for you all the way, just for you.
No dialogue, but all the guys checking out Gillian as she walks through the casino to Cal is pretty cool ;)
Cal: All of it on double zero. Alright, Foster?
(They look at each other after the wheel begins spinning)
Next Lie to me* review: 2×10 Tractor Man
Previous Lie to me* review: 2×08 Secret Santa